Andrew Garfield gets vulnerable about grief, with support from Elmo

Andrew Garfield has inspired renewed discussion online about grief and emotion after a video of him opening up to “Sesame Street’s” Elmo drew millions of views on social media and an influx of support.

A clip of Garfield talking with the Muppet, shared to X on Friday, sparked a flood of responses from social media users who shared that they can relate to Garfield’s grief.

Garfield’s mother, Lynn, died of pancreatic cancer in 2019 shortly before he began filming his 2021 movie “Tick, Tick... Boom!” Garfield had previously opened up about how working on the film helped him cope with his loss.

Sitting on a stoop beside Elmo, the actor held a vulnerable conversation about his mourning journey as he told the furry red Muppet about his late mother.

“Elmo’s going around Sesame Street checking in on everybody,” Elmo told a smiling Garfield. “So, Elmo wants to know how Andrew’s doing?”

With some encouragement from the Muppet, Garfield revealed that he’s been thinking about his mom.

“She passed away not too long ago, and you know, I just miss her. Miss her a lot,” Garfield said, his voice thick with emotion.

After Elmo responded apologetically, Garfield reassured the Muppet that there’s no need to say sorry, and that “it’s actually kind of OK to miss somebody,” even if it triggers feelings of sadness.

“That sadness is kind of a gift. It’s kind of a lovely thing to feel, in a way, because it means you really loved somebody when you miss them,” Garfield said, adding: “When I miss my mom, I remember all of the cuddles I used to get from her, all of the hugs I used to get from her.”

Some users said the clip was posted on or near the anniversary of their own parent’s death, and others thanked the pair for normalizing such emotions and explaining it in a way that children can understand.

Garfield closed his thoughts by saying that he can miss and celebrate his mother at the same time. Elmo, who nodded in agreement as he thanked Garfield for sharing his emotions, told Garfield, “You know what, Elmo is gonna think about and celebrate your mommy, too.”

The influx of heartwarming responses posed a contrast to the reaction Elmo received when he unwittingly unearthed a deluge of despair from internet users after posting a casual wellness check on X earlier this year.

In January, he had asked a seemingly innocent question: “Elmo is just checking in! How is everybody doing?” — only to be met with declarations of “existential dread,” mental burnout and general disenchantment with daily life.

The dreary responses later inspired Sesame Workshop, the nonprofit behind “Sesame Street,” to undertake a nationwide mental health survey that the organization published in August. Now, the internet appears once again to be confiding in the children’s character.

The clip aired the same day that Garfield appeared on Amelia Dimoldenberg’s popular celebrity interview show “Chicken Shop Date,” a long-awaited collab that already had the internet buzzing.

Garfield’s upcoming film “We Live in Time,” a romantic comedy starring him and Florence Pugh, also sees him fall in love with a restaurant owner who is diagnosed with late-stage ovarian cancer, a fact the couple must come to terms with as they navigate life together.

About a week before his conversation with Elmo, Garfield candidly discussed grief during his appearance on an episode of The New York Times’ “Modern Love” podcast. While reading Chris Huntington’s essay “Learning to Measure Time in Love and Loss,” Garfield stopped to wipe his tears.

It opened up a raw conversation with host Anna Martin, as he told her that he was “sad” — at the transience of some relationships, at the loss of his mother, at the idea of losing his father, at the concept of not having his own children.

“But the sadness is longing. It’s true longing, and there’s no shame in it,” Garfield said on the podcast. “And I can feel myself right now putting the modern conditioning taboo on this very, very pure feeling I’m having and expressing with you. And I find that sad.”

He goes on to express his disappointment that there are cultural expectations discouraging people from being vulnerable in this way, that an “impulse that is not mine” is telling him to “pull yourself together” even now.

“And I think it’s so easy now to feel hopeless in this current state of the world. Being alive right now, it can feel quite hopeless. And we can feel quite numb, we can feel quite disconnected and isolated,” Garfield said. “But I don’t know. I feel like the feeling, the longing lives in all of us: the longing to connect, the longing to love, the longing to risk.”